For this assignment, I chose to create a promotional piece that introduces Animal Rights PNW’s goals, and proposed solutions to prevent animal cruelty.
First I researched the issues. This was not a difficult task, the State of WA laws for animal cruelty are not as protective of the animals as one could imagine. After reading some more information on a couple of blogs, I came to the conclusion that the major cause to the lack of the rights for animals is the fact that they are not recognized as sentient beings.
Recently New Zealand government recognized all animals as sentient beings to provide harsher, stricter punishments for the cruelty to animals thus increasing protection to all animals.
I knew what to do…
I wrote a small script and read it to my iPhone. To provide clarity of the voice, I used my closet, which will keep my narration track as clean as possible. I laid down the track and made a couple of adjustments to make sure the levels were up to the standard (between -12 volume units and peak at no higher than 0 – (-3)). I cut the pauses out and removed the unneeded versions of the voice over. Then cut it again… and again… while adjusting the soundtrack to where it’s rhythm matched up with the rhythm of my voice.
Next, I found several tracks for my background music and I am planning to use at least a couple of animal sound effects in the final public announcement piece. I am looking to get more recordings and play around to see how I can enrich the ad and compliment the voice over without it becoming too distracting to listen. Perhaps come up with an intro and outro to make the piece sound complete. As a final piece, I would like to add another statement at the end to make it more obvious for my audience what to do next.
I am looking forward to working on the final bit but here is a rough cut of the main vocal with some example (not final) music track.
My voice is recovering from the cold… so, I may have to redo the narration.
As a soundtrack, I used “Unnatural Situation” by Kevin MacLeod, royalty free music (2008). This musical compilation is dramatic, intense, and reflects the tone of the narration, which meant to express pain and suffering of the animals who are not adequately protected under law from human cruelty.
At the end, of the audio ad, I wanted to switch the tone to positive. I laid a fragment of “Kings and Queens” by 30 Seconds to Mars. This song is amazingly motivating and if this or similar audio is used as a soundtrack to the part where the narration is calling to action, the assumption here is to persuade and motivate the listeners to support the cause. As a Fair Use Guidelines suggest, I am using this fragment for educational non-commercial, limited and “transformative” purpose.
This is a great meaningful subject. It is always great seeing someone devoting their time to the cause of animal cruelty prevention. The product has a very well-matched background music that is very fitting to the storyline. It made me want to listen to more. I definitely liked the approach despite the flu influenced voice you mentioned in your post. It was very informative and had well placed transitions. Overall the storyline jives with the music. I especially like the conclusion of the story. I got a feeling of sympathizing with the cause and doing my part to make a better life experience for these animals.
I would like to suggest that you add another interest peeking or underlining portion midway or shorten the storyline. I felt like I wanted more and couldn’t get there. I would also like to suggest that you polish some of the transition points and make them more seamless. Great topic and worthy cause. Looking forward to listening the final product with the regular voice.
Thank you! Great suggestions! I will work on my pauses and transitions, seem like it is all said in one breath. For the more part, I am wondering what would you want to hear? is it more examples of what you can do, or is it something else?
Hi, Mikhail!
Wow, I liked a lot in this production. The arc seems to be obvious to the listener with a definite beginning, middle (with conflict) and an ending resolution. I like the calm, melancholy music at the beginning and the building musical crescendo at the end. I just want to put it out there, since we had so much emphasis on this in the earlier tutorials, that you should check to see if there are any conflicts by using licensed music. I just don’t want to see your grade diminished if you need permission to use a song and don’t have it. All that said, I think it might be effective to insert more ambient sounds of animals as an underbed or background. I hate to mention it, but perhaps the sounds of an animal shelter when you’re describing the cruelty against animals around :43 seconds. Anyone who has been to a shelter will instantly recognize that sound of dozens of caged animals. It’s a terrible sound but might lend more power here as a background noise or as a featured effect for just a few seconds. Just a thought. Once again, I love the message and the think the dialogue you’ve scripted is powerful and works to tell a story. Well done, man!
Steve
Steve, Thank you very much. awesome suggestions! I appreciate your input. This gave me a good perspective on what needs to be done.
Hi Mikhail,
What a powerful, informative topic for your audio story. You have a great voice (even with the cold), and the speed of your narration was natural. The emotion in your voice is excellent.
A couple of critiques: I would add some pauses in your narration, especially at important parts, such as right before you explain ways individuals can get involved. The narration is continuous, and there’s not a lot of “breathing room” (so to speak) where the listener can pause and digest the important information being given to them. I think pauses would help emphasize critical parts of your story.
I would also like a few more sounds. I enjoyed the background music you picked, but think a few more sounds could be added for effect, such as animal sounds placed strategically throughout your narration.
Overall, it’s a strong draft. I look forward to hearing your final audio story!
Christine
Thank you very much, Christine!
These are all awesome suggestions. Yes, I agree I need to add a few natural pauses and some nat sound or b-roll.
Self-critique/Final thought
After reading the feedback on my ad, I recognized the issues clearly:
Add pauses to my narrations. My editing was too tight and I have to spread the parts apart to make it sound more natural and impactful.
Add a few more sound effects, animal noises, especially at the very beginning. It may establish my story better and clearer to the audience.
Add a detail or two to the call to action, perhaps visit on facebook or like us on facebook. Or something to that extent.
After listening to others and going back and listening to mine, it was clear to me that I needed to work on couple things but I was also appreciative of the positive commentary by my peers. Everyone had strong drafts, I liked Steve’s the most! I thought his was most closest to the “real thing.”